End of life Choices Q&A Forum with Resources
Welcome to a space where death is not feared, but honored. Where choice is sacred, and where the default systems—like hospice—are not the only path. This guide is for those seeking clarity, options, and sovereignty in their final chapter.
What is Euthanasia?
Euthanasia is when a medical professional directly administers life-ending medication at the request of a consenting patient.
- Voluntary euthanasia: The patient chooses and consents.
- Involuntary euthanasia: Done without consent (not legal in most places).
Where is it legal?
- Legal in: Belgium, Netherlands, Luxembourg, Colombia, Canada, Spain, New Zealand, Australia, Ecuador, Portugal2
- Not legal in the U.S., though some states allow physician-assisted dying (see below).
Resources:
- World Population Review – Euthanasia Laws by Country
- Newsweek Map of Assisted Dying Laws
What is Physician Aid in dying? (pad)
Also called Medical Aid in Dying (MAID), PAD allows a doctor to prescribe life-ending medication, which the patient then self-administers.
Where is it legal in the U.S.?
- Legal in: Oregon, Washington, California, Colorado, Vermont, Maine, New Jersey, New Mexico, Hawaii, Montana, and Washington D.C.
Resources:
- BMA Global PAD Legislation Overview
- Compassion & Choices – U.S. MAID Advocacy
What is Self-delivery?
Self-delivery refers to the act of ending one’s life intentionally, often with support from a death doula or guide, but without medical intervention.
- This may include VSED (Voluntarily Stopping Eating and Drinking), ritual-based transitions, or spiritual practices.
- Legal status: VSED is legal in most U.S. states. Other forms vary widely and are often unregulated.
Resources:
- Final Exit Network
- Death with Dignity National Center
What is Hospice?
What About Hospice?
Hospice is often the default—but it’s not the only option.
- Hospice focuses on comfort care, but can limit autonomy, especially for those seeking MAID or alternative transitions.
- Many people feel disempowered by the hospice model.
Destiny’s Door will exist for those who want something different: nature-based, ritual-rooted, and choice-driven care.
Can I talk Privately about my Options?
Can I Talk to Someone Privately About My Options?
Yes. You can schedule a private Q&A session with Paula, founder of Destiny’s Door and a certified death-walker. These sessions are confidential, compassionate, and designed to help you explore your options with clarity and courage.
Support the Vision: Help Build Destiny’s Door
Destiny’s Door is being built from the ground up—a sanctuary for intentional dying, ritual-rooted care, and true autonomy at the end of life.
We’re not yet a 501(c)(3); your early donations will help us get there. This is the start-up phase, and every contribution helps manifest the vision.
If you feel called to support or co-create this space, reach out to me personally. We have meaningful ways to thank you, and we’re open to your ideas for how you’d like to contribute.
🌿 This is for everyone who doesn’t want hospice as their only choice.
👉 Donate. Collaborate. Build the future of death care.
Resources That most wont discuss
Books:
1. The VSED Handbook: A Practical Guide to Voluntarily Stopping Eating and Drinking by Kate Christie.
2.Voluntarily Stopping Eating and Drinking: A Compassionate, Widely-Available Option for Hastening Death edited by Timothy E. Quill et al.. This book offers legal, medical, and ethical perspectives on VSED.
3.Scripting Death: Stories of Assisted Dying in America by Mara Buchbinder.
4.Physician-Assisted Dying: The Case for Palliative Care and Patient Choice edited by Timothy E. Quill and Margaret P. Battin. This collection presents arguments for legalizing PAD.
5.A Time to Die: The Place for Physician Assistance by Charles F. McKhann. Explores the medical, ethical, and legal issues of PAD.
6.Resources on medical aid in dying are available from Compassion & Choices.
7.NOTICE HOW VERY LITTLE IS WRITTEN ABOUT MAID!!!!!
8.A Chosen Death: The Dying Confront Assisted Suicide by Lonny Shavelson. This book shares accounts from terminally ill individuals.
9.A Gentle Death by Marilynne Seguin.
10.Final Exit: The Practicalities of Self-Deliverance
and Assisted Suicide for the Dying. 3rd edition
by Derek Humphry.